Why You Feel Everything More During Retrograde Season: A Guide for Empaths and Highly Sensitive Women
So let me tell you what I have been hearing a lot lately in my practice. Variations of this: "I do not know why I feel so heavy right now. I know nothing is actually wrong in my life. I know I should not feel this anxious or this sad. But here I am."
If that sounds familiar, let's talk about what might actually be going on.
What retrograde season actually does to a sensitive nervous system
First, a quick middle-ground explanation for those of you who are somewhat familiar with astrology but do not consider yourselves experts. A planet in retrograde is not actually moving backward. It is an optical illusion based on the relative movement of Earth and that planet in their orbits. But what astrology teaches, and what many of my clients experience viscerally, is that retrograde periods tend to bring a slowing down, an inward pull, and a stirring up of energy that was already present beneath the surface.
Part of the Woo-Fluent™ Series: When the planets shift, sensitive nervous systems feel it first. Here is what is actually happening and what to do about it.
Hi, I am Laura Zane, a licensed therapist and the creator of the Woo-Fluent™ framework at Sage Synergy Counseling and Wellness. I work with highly sensitive, neurodivergent, and empathic women throughout Florida who feel things deeply and are done pretending they do not. I am also someone who takes planetary energy seriously. Not as a replacement for clinical thinking, but as a real and valid layer of the human experience that most therapists will not talk about with you. I will.
Photo by: Am on Unsplash
So let me tell you what I have been hearing a lot lately in my practice. Variations of this: "I do not know why I feel so heavy right now. I know nothing is actually wrong in my life. I know I should not feel this anxious or this sad. But here I am." And that is something that comes up every single retrograde cycle, like clockwork. If that sounds familiar, let's talk about what might actually be going on.
What retrograde season actually does to a sensitive nervous system
First, a quick middle-ground explanation for those of you who are somewhat familiar with astrology but do not consider yourselves experts. A planet in retrograde is not actually moving backward. It is an optical illusion based on the relative movement of Earth and that planet in their orbits. But what astrology teaches, and what many of my clients experience viscerally, is that retrograde periods tend to bring a slowing down, an inward pull, and a stirring up of energy that was already present beneath the surface.
When multiple planets are in retrograde at the same time, that amplification compounds. For most people this might look like technology glitches, miscommunications, or a general sense of things feeling off. For empaths and highly sensitive people it can feel like a full nervous system overload. The emotional volume of everything gets turned way up.
"Just because you are feeling it does not mean it is yours. And just because the timing feels cosmic does not mean you are making it up."
Here is what I want you to understand clinically and cosmically. Your nervous system as a highly sensitive or empathic person is already processing more information than the average person. You absorb the emotional states of people around you. You pick up on the energy in a room before anyone has said a word. You feel the collective weight of what is happening in your community, your news feed, your environment. That is not metaphor. That is how your system works.
When retrograde energy amplifies the collective field, your already-sensitive system absorbs more of it. The sadness you are feeling may not be about your life at all. It may be the grief of your community, the anxiety of the people closest to you, or the energetic weight of something much larger than your personal circumstances. That is real. And it deserves to be taken seriously.
Your environment is part of your emotional landscape too
This is something I talk about with my Florida clients especially. We live in a state where environmental issues like red tide, algae blooms, and water quality concerns are not just news stories. They are felt. If you are a sensitive person who loves the water, who feels connected to the natural world, and who picks up on collective distress, local environmental suffering lands in your body differently than it does for others.
This is not weakness. This is your nervous system doing exactly what it is built to do. The challenge is learning to acknowledge what you are absorbing without drowning in it. Feeling the weight of the world is part of being wired the way you are. Carrying it as if it is all yours to fix is where it becomes unsustainable.
How to tell what is yours and what belongs to the collective
This is the most important practice I teach empaths and highly sensitive people, and retrograde season is when it matters most. Mindfulness gives us a way to pause, observe, and get curious about our experience rather than just being swept away by it.
The retrograde check-in practice
Pause before you personalize. When a heavy feeling arrives, especially one without a clear source, stop before you start writing a story about what it means about your life. Ask first: was I feeling this before I opened social media, before I talked to that person, before I read that news story?
Do a personal inventory. Is there something actually happening in my own life right now that would explain this feeling? If you genuinely cannot find the source in your own circumstances, the feeling may belong to the collective field, not to your personal story.
Ground yourself physically. Feel your feet on the floor. Put your hands on your belly. Take three slow breaths. Grounding brings you back into your own body and helps you separate your emotional baseline from what you have absorbed from outside yourself.
Limit your energetic intake. During heavy retrograde seasons, this is not the time to scroll endlessly, have the big hard conversations, or take on everyone else's problems. Protect your field intentionally. This is not avoidance. It is nervous system hygiene.
Do what is yours to do and release the rest. You do not have to fix the world. Figure out what is actually in your power, your small sphere of influence, and put your energy there. Sign the petition. Show up for the friend. Rest so you have something to give tomorrow. Then consciously release what is not yours to carry.
You are an analyzer by nature. Retrograde amplifies that too.
One of the hallmarks of being highly sensitive or neurodivergent is a tendency toward deep analysis. You do not just feel things, you think about why you feel them, what they mean, what you should do about them, and what it says about you that you feel them at all. During retrograde season this analytical loop can go into overdrive.
Mindfulness is not about stopping the analysis. It is about creating a little bit of space between the feeling and the story you are building around it. When you can observe your own process with some curiosity rather than getting completely consumed by it, you reclaim your ability to choose how to respond rather than just react.
That space is where your clarity lives. And it is accessible to you even when the planetary energy is heavy and the collective field is loud.
You cannot save the world. That is actually okay.
Empaths and highly sensitive people tend to feel responsible for everything. The suffering in the news. The struggling friend. The state of the waterways. The collective grief of an entire community during a difficult season. When you feel it all so deeply it is natural to want to fix it all.
But here is what I come back to with my clients again and again. Even the smallest action taken with intention creates a ripple effect. You do not have to carry all of it to matter. You just have to show up for the piece that is genuinely yours. Maybe that is signing a petition. Maybe it is making sure you get enough sleep so you have something to give the people who need you most. Maybe it is recognizing that right now your job is to take care of yourself, and that is enough.
The idea that start local and affect global is not a consolation prize. It is actually how change works. And it is how sustainable, sensitive people stay in the game long term rather than burning out completely by trying to hold everything at once.
Frequently asked questions
Is it really possible that planetary retrograde affects how I feel emotionally?
From a clinical perspective, I can tell you that collective energy is real. When large numbers of people are experiencing heightened anxiety, grief, or overwhelm simultaneously, that collective state ripples through social networks, media, and direct human contact in ways that affect all of us. For highly sensitive people and empaths who are already wired to absorb the emotional states of others, those collective shifts land harder and faster. Whether you attribute that to planetary influence, collective consciousness, or pure nervous system sensitivity, the experience is valid and the tools for managing it are the same.
Why does Mercury retrograde seem to hit me harder than other people?
Mercury retrograde is associated with communication, technology, and mental processing. For neurodivergent and highly sensitive people whose nervous systems are already working overtime to process information, a period that energetically amplifies those same areas can feel particularly destabilizing. You are not imagining it. Your system is just more finely tuned to those frequencies than the average person.
How do I protect my energy during heavy astrological seasons without becoming isolated?
The goal is not to disconnect from the world. It is to engage with it more intentionally. During heavy seasons that means being selective about what you consume and when, building in more grounding and recovery time than usual, choosing your social interactions with more care, and having a daily practice that brings you back to your own baseline. You can stay connected and protective at the same time. It just requires more intentionality than it does during easier seasons.
I identify as an intuitive or empath but I also have ADHD. Does that make retrograde season harder?
Often yes. ADHD nervous systems already struggle with emotional regulation, rejection sensitivity, and the ability to filter out what is not immediately relevant. Add the amplified collective energy of a retrograde period on top of a system that is already processing a lot, and the overwhelm can feel really significant. Working with a therapist who understands both the neurodivergent experience and the empathic or intuitive experience makes a real difference during these seasons.
Is it okay to take a break from the news and social media during retrograde?
Not only is it okay, for many highly sensitive and empathic people it is genuinely necessary. There is nothing spiritually or ethically wrong with protecting your nervous system during a heavy season. Staying informed does not require you to be continuously immersed in distressing content. You can care deeply about the world and still give yourself permission to step back and recharge. In fact for sensitive people, rest is often how you build the capacity to keep showing up.
How is what you do different from seeing a regular therapist?
I bring two decades of clinical training and licensure alongside a genuine, lived understanding of what it means to be highly sensitive, neurodivergent, and spiritually aware. I am not going to pathologize your intuitive gifts, dismiss your experience of collective energy, or ask you to leave your spiritual framework at the door. I call this being Woo-Fluent™. It means I speak both languages, clinical and cosmic, and I will not make you choose between them in our work together.
Ready to stop white-knuckling your way through every heavy season?
If you are a highly sensitive, neurodivergent, or empathic woman in Florida who is tired of feeling everything and not knowing what to do with it, I would love to work with you. Through online therapy we can build the grounding practices, energetic boundaries, and self-awareness that let you stay connected to the world without drowning in it. Bring a willing heart. I will bring the tea.
Does this resonate, but therapy is not what you are looking for right now?
There is an important distinction between therapy and spiritual coaching, and both are valid paths depending on where you are. If you are looking for spiritual guidance, empath support, or intuitive coaching rather than clinical mental health treatment, that work lives at Coaching for Empaths. Visit the link below to learn more about how we can work together outside the therapy room.
The Capable & Overwhelmed Trap: When Looking Fine on the Outside Means Suffering Inside
From the outside, you look like you have it together. You are capable, reliable, and the one people count on. But inside, you are overwhelmed, exhausted, and quietly running on empty. This is what neurodivergent burnout can look like, especially for women who have learned to mask and carry more than their nervous system was ever meant to hold. If that sounds familiar, you are not alone, and you are not broken.
By Laura Zane, LMHC | Sage Synergy Counseling & Wellness | Online Therapy in Florida
From the outside? You look like you have it all together.
The kids are fed and at school on time (mostly on time, I see you my ADHDers). The house isn’t a total disaster; it’s good enough. You’re showing up to work. You’re keeping the marriage going. A lot of the time, you are the person other people call when things get hard, because honestly, you just seem like you’ve got it together.
This pattern is especially common in neurodivergent women and highly sensitive adults who have learned to mask their struggles while quietly carrying an overwhelming mental and emotional load.
But here’s what nobody sees: you are sinking.
Your meltdowns happen in the shower. They happen during your revenge procrastination bedtime. That sweet quiet time when the house is finally asleep. You KNOW you need to go to bed; instead, you stay up too late and maybe even fall apart. Your downtime is spent sleeping, hoping to recover from the sensory and emotional overload that just never stops. You fantasize about escaping on a solo vacation. Not because you don’t love your family, you absolutely do, but because you are running on empty and you know that a few days alone would mean coming back fuller. More present. More you.
Sound familiar? Welcome to what I call the Capable & Overwhelmed Trap. And yes, I have been there. More on that in a bit.
Neurodivergent Burnout: Why You Feel Fine on the Outside but Overwhelmed Inside
This is something I see all the time in neurodivergent women, especially those with ADHD, autism, or high sensitivity. Women who look like they are functioning well on the outside but are actually experiencing burnout and overwhelm internally.
And the hard part? The more capable you are, the easier it is for this to go unnoticed. By other people. And eventually, by you too.
What Is the Capable and Overwhelmed Trap?
A lot of neurodivergent people, whether that is ADHD, autism, sensory processing differences, anxiety, or some delightful grab bag of all of the above, get really good at masking. Masking is basically learning to perform “normal” in a world that was not designed for your brain. You learn young. You become a masking expert. And eventually it becomes so conditioned, so automatic, that even the people closest to you have no idea how much effort it takes just to get through a regular Tuesday. Hell, sometimes you don’t even realize you have put on the mask!
The Catch 22 is the better you are at masking, the more invisible your struggle becomes. To everyone around you. And sometimes to yourself.
When you look like you have it all together, people assume you can handle more. So more gets added. And because you’ve been doing it so well, it never occurs to most people to ask if you’re actually okay.
Why Women Mask More (Society, We Need to Talk)
Neurodivergent women mask at significantly higher rates than their male counterparts, and that is not an accident.
From the time we are little girls, we are taught to manage other people’s feelings. Be agreeable. Be helpful. Keep the peace. Smile through it. Take care of others. Was anyone else given that stupid JOY message? Jesus, Others, Yourself? Talk about a recipe for burn out! These messages become part of who we are, so much so that many of us do not even notice we are doing it. It just feels like being a good person. A good mom. A good partner. A good employee. And, society rewards us for it.
But what it actually looks like in practice is a neurodivergent woman who has become so skilled at managing everyone else’s experience that she has completely lost track of her own.
The world taught us to manage other people’s feelings. Nobody taught us to manage our own nervous system. And that gap? That’s where the overwhelm lives.
Layer on top of that a world that was not built for neurodivergent brains, and you have a very exhausted, very masked, very burnt out woman who looks, from the outside, like she is absolutely thriving.
The “What If” Gap: Why Neurotypicals Don’t See What You See
Here is something that might help you feel a little less alone in the resentment spiral: neurotypical people are generally not the ultra deep thinkers. They are not going seven layers deep when they ask you for something.
When they ask for help, they are not thinking: “If she says no, who will do this? She only asks when she really needs it so she must really need it. I can’t leave her without support. What if something goes wrong? What if she thinks I don’t care?”
They are thinking: “I need help. She’s good at this. I’ll ask.” That’s it. No seven-layer dip of consequences and contingencies.
But your brain? Your brain is already running all the scenerios before you can even answer. You are calculating their emotional reaction, your own guilt, the litany of what-ifs, and three different worst case possibilities, all at the same time. That is not a flaw. That is a highly empathic, pattern-seeking brain doing what it does. But it is also an enormous amount of invisible labor that neurotypicals simply do not carry, and often do not even know to account for.
They asked a simple question. You answered a 47-question internal exam. No wonder you’re exhausted.
And Then There’s Menopause (Nobody Warned Me About This Part)
Okay can we talk about this? Because I feel like it does not get said enough.
Before menopause, things were hard. During menopause? I was a walking train wreck that forgot even where the tracks were.
And I want you to know…if you are in perimenopause or menopause and everything has suddenly gotten louder, harder, more overwhelming, and somehow more intense all at once, you are not imagining it and you are not losing your mind!
Here is what is actually happening: estrogen does a lot of behind-the-scenes work for your brain. It supports executive function, helps regulate your nervous system, and plays a role in how you process sensory input and emotions. TADA! Enter peri-menopause: hormones starts going haywire, everything that was a little hard becomes impossible. The ADHD symptoms you had mostly figured out? Back like a bad fungus in the middle of a rain forest. The sensory sensitivities you had learned to work around? They amplify like an 80’s rock concert. Sleep falls apart. Anxiety spikes. The masking that you didn’t realize your were doing…becomes almost impossible.
A Confession (Or: The Day Three Clients All Showed Up for the Same Appointment Time and I Wanted to Disappear)
Okay. Storytime. And I am sharing this because I think it will make you feel better about literally any scheduling mistake you have ever made.
About a year into my private practice, I was an overbooked, overwhelmed, mom with an infant practice running on fumes, and doing that very thing I talk to clients about, taking on more than my nervous system could actually handle.
Client One was a regular. She called to schedule, we set her up for my 10 am appointment, and then I got distracted (hi, ADHD) and forgot to add it to my calendar. She showed up. I had completely forgotten, because typical ADHD, out of sight, out of mind.
Client Two was a new client. She called, I booked her for 10 am, same time as client One. Apparently, between booking the appointment and crying kids, I got pulled away before I could record it.
Day of, Client Three called in crisis. I had to get her in immediately. Cool, I love how Divine works things out…I have a 10 am open.(You see where this is going right?) I was like come on in.
The first one to show was my crisis client. As she is crying I hear the door open and close. Huh, that is weird, my office mate doesn’t usually work Thursdays. I go out and it was my regular. I was like oh no, I am so sorry, I double booked. Go back, work with the crisis client, in walks my new client. I check to see if she is there for my office mate, NO, I am here for you. I was mortified. I felt like a terrible therapist. Like I had failed people at the exact moments they needed reliability most. Enter self-criticism .
But here is the truth: I was not a bad therapist. I was an overwhelmed therapist who had taken on too much and had absolutely zero systems in place to compensate for my brain’s very predictable weak spots.
The fix was not to try harder or be more careful or give myself a stern lecture about being more organized. The fix was self-scheduling software, so the system does what my brain was never consistently going to do on its own. Simple. Practical. Genuinely life changing.
The “Just Say No” Problem (It Is Not That Simple)
“Just say no!” Oh, cool. Thanks. Super helpful. Why did none of us think of that? Insert eye roll here.
Here is what actually happens: someone asks you to do something. Your nervous system is already maxed out and you do not process that fast enough in the moment. (Remember you are not just processing the request, but those 47 internal questions) Panic and overwhelm set in. So you say yes. Then later, when you’ve had actual time process all the pieces, you realize: oh no, I have overcommited.
Then, you have to go back and say…well actually…I thought I could, but… (which, by the way, is a sign of self-awareness, not flakiness), you are often met with annoyance or frustration. Cue: people-pleasing, rejection sensitivity, self-doubt or trauma history triggers around disappointing people.
A lot of us also have the urge to over-explain. We think: If I just give them enough context, they will understand and they will not be upset. What actually happens is the more you explain, the more others who are used to you being there, begin to negotiate. Suddenly you are stuck in a conversation your nervous system did not sign up for, you cannot think fast enough to find the exit, and you say yes again. And then the spiral: resentment, self-criticism, shame. Why can I never just say no? What is wrong with me?
Nothing. Nothing is wrong with you, except that you may need some actual tools.
5 Ways to Say No (Plus a Maybe, Because Sometimes You Just Need a Minute)
Short. Warm. Firm. No novel-length explanation. Here is what works:
“While I’d love to help, I don’t have the energy for that right now.” Honest and human. Energy is a real resource. Yours is limited. That is a complete sentence.
“I can’t prioritize that right now, so I’ll need to decline.” Clean. Professional. Nothing to argue with.
“My time is limited right now, and I can’t. Thank you for thinking of me.” A little warmth without opening the door for negotiation.
“Thank you for thinking of me. I’m not able to help with that.” The sentence ends at “though.” Do not add more. I know you want to. Do not.
“That doesn’t align with my goals right now, so I’m going to pass.” Great for professional settings. Decisive. Forward-looking. Very “I have my life together” energy even when you do not.
And the maybe, for when your brain genuinely needs time to process:
“I’d like some time to consider that. Can I get back to you in 24 to 48 hours?” This is not stalling. This is your brain doing what it needs to do, checking in with your actual capacity instead of defaulting to yes under pressure. Use this one freely and without guilt.
A few extras for the collection:
“I’m at capacity right now.”
“I’m not the right person for this right now.”
“I need to protect my bandwidth this season.”
The Capable & Overwhelmed Trap Is Real and It Is Exhausting
There is nothing small about carrying this much, even if your life looks “fine” from the outside.
When you are used to being the capable one, the reliable one, the one who figures it out, it can be really hard to even recognize how much you are holding, let alone give yourself permission to need support.
It’s okay to say, I need help. I can’t do this alone anymore.
That is often where things begin to shift.
Learning to protect your nervous system, say no without the guilt spiral, stop masking your way into burnout, and build a life that actually works with your brain rather than against it, these are all things you can genuinely work on. And when you do, the shift is real. Not just for you, but for everyone around you.
Because a you that is actually resourced is so much more present than a you that is white-knuckling through every single day. Your family does not need you to look fine. They need you to actually be okay.
If you are ready for support, we can work together in therapy to help you understand your capacity, reduce overwhelm, and build a life that actually works with your brain. I provide online therapy throughout Florida, including Miami, Naples, Tampa, Sarasota, Bradenton, Lakewood Ranch, Palm Beach, Boca Raton, and Orlando.
And if you are not quite ready for therapy, but you know something needs to change, you can start smaller. I have a boundaries course that walks you through how to protect your time, energy, and bandwidth in a way that actually sticks, without burning yourself out in the process.
FAQ’s
Questions I Hear All the Time (You Are Not Alone in These)
Is it normal to feel more overwhelmed than other people even when my life looks fine from the outside?
A: Yes—well, neurodivergent normal. Our brains process sensory input, emotional information, and everyday demands more intensely than neurotypical brains. What looks manageable from the outside can be genuinely exhausting from the inside. You are not being dramatic or too sensitive. You are not weak. You are running a very different operating system in a world that was designed for a different one.
Why do I always say yes and then immediately regret it?
A: So common, especially for people with ADHD or trauma histories. Many neurodivergences come with executive processing issues, which can cause delayed processing. That means your brain cannot always assess your real capacity when pressure is applied—you know, like when you feel people want an answer “NOW.”
Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria means the fear of disappointing someone can override logic instantly. You say yes before your nervous system has even been consulted. The regret shows up later, when the pressure is off and reality has a chance to land.
I think I might be in perimenopause. Could that be making my ADHD or anxiety worse?
A: Almost certainly yes. Estrogen supports executive function, emotional regulation, and how your brain manages sensory input. As it fluctuates during perimenopause, a lot of neurodivergent women see their symptoms ramp up significantly.
Many gifted women get what I call an “ultra late” diagnosis in their 40s or 50s because the hormone changes interfere with their coping skills and ability to mask. If things that used to feel manageable suddenly feel impossible, that is worth exploring with both a therapist and a knowledgeable medical provider. And no, you are not just “getting worse.” Your baseline changed. That matters.
I live in Miami, Naples, Tampa, or Palm Beach and cannot find a therapist who actually understands neurodivergence. What do I do?
A: This is exactly why I offer online therapy throughout Florida. You do not have to choose between finding someone who genuinely understands neurodivergence and finding someone who is available in your area.
We can work together from wherever you are, whether that is a quiet corner of your house in Boca Raton, your parked car on your lunch break in Naples (no judgment, we have all been there), or the one room in your house with a door that locks.
Like this topic and Want More? Check out these blogs.
Buy the precut Watermelon is about choosing less to reduce anxiety and overwhelm and get more out of life.
Burnout In Highly Sensitive women is about being a neurodivergent woman while homeschooling.
When the World Feels Heavy: A Mother and Therapist Reflects on Grief, Compassion, and Choosing Love
Grief Trigger Warning
Sometimes the world feels very heavy.
This is what was on my heart this morning.
Many people, especially highly sensitive and compassionate people, feel deeply affected by suffering in the world. When violence, war, or tragedy appear in the news, it can leave us feeling overwhelmed, heartbroken, or powerless.
Before anything else, I am a mother.
Yes, I am Laura.
Grief Trigger Warning
Sometimes the world feels very heavy.
This is what was on my heart this morning.
Many people, especially highly sensitive and compassionate people, feel deeply affected by suffering in the world. When violence, war, or tragedy appear in the news, it can leave us feeling overwhelmed, heartbroken, or powerless.
Before anything else, I am a mother.
Yes, I am Laura.
I am a therapist.
I am a wife and partner, a sister, a daughter. I am many things in this life. But when my children were born, something shifted in me in a way that is hard to explain to anyone who has not experienced it.
No matter what other roles I hold in this world, I am always a mother first.
And this morning I woke up heavy.
The Grief Mothers Carry Across the World
There are little girls who left for school and never came home. An occurrence that should never happen, yet is repeated. There are mothers waiting for sons and daughters who may never return from war. There are children who will grow up without the parents who once held them. Every life lost is someone’s child.
Across oceans and across languages I can imagine the sound a mother makes when she realizes her child is gone. I can imagine that same sound from mothers here at home who fear for their children’s safety.
Grief like that needs no translation.
I struggle to understand how humans reach a place where violence becomes acceptable. Even the smallest forms of harm make me pause, so the loss of human life, any human life, feels unbearable to me.
When the World Feels Heavy and We Feel Powerless
I hear people say thoughts and prayers, and I know that is often a reaction to feeling powerless.
I feel powerless too.
And if I am honest, I am angry.
I feel anger toward the leaders and systems that move the world closer to violence instead of healing. I feel anger when human life begins to feel expendable in public conversations.
Part of me wants to shout that the people making these decisions should have to face the consequences themselves.
And another part of me remembers that every soldier, every child, every person caught in conflict is still someone’s child. Still innocent. Still loved by a mother somewhere.
Holding those two truths at the same time is painful.
The Connection Between Love, Anger, and Compassion
The anger I feel is real, but underneath it is something deeper.
Because hate is not the opposite of love.
Hate is the shadow side of love.
You only feel that kind of anger when something you love deeply feels threatened.
And what I love is life.
Children.
Families.
The fragile miracle that any of us are here at all.
Choosing Compassion in a World That Feels Heavy
Feeling grief for the world does not mean something is wrong with you; often it means your compassion is still very much alive. So I refuse to add more hatred to a world that already has too much of it.
Instead, I will do what I can.
I will do my best to help heal the people who sit across from me in my therapy room. I will raise my children to be compassionate humans. I will keep choosing love even on the days when anger would be easier.
I cannot change the entire world.
But I can care deeply for the small corner of it that is mine.
Today I grieve for mothers everywhere. The mothers across the ocean whose language I will never speak. The mothers here at home worried about their own children. The mothers who will wake up tomorrow and ask themselves what they did wrong.
Grief needs no translation.
Because when you are a mother, every child feels a little bit like your own.
The grief I feel today is the shadow of my compassion. It is what compassion looks like when it runs into a world that still chooses violence.
If I did not care so deeply about life, about children, about families, I would not feel this pain.
So I will not try to silence it.
I will let it remind me why compassion matters.
Maybe my small voice will not change the world.
But maybe it adds one small kernel of compassion to it.
And maybe, just maybe, that still matters.
I will honor that my vulnerability, my compassion, and my love are my strength.
If This Resonates With You
This reflection may resonate with you if:
• You feel overwhelmed or heartbroken when you hear about suffering in the world
• You are a highly sensitive or deeply compassionate person
• World events sometimes leave you feeling powerless or heavy
• You care deeply about humanity but struggle with how to hold that compassion without becoming overwhelmed
• You are trying to raise children with empathy and kindness in a complicated world
Feeling deeply is not a weakness. Often, it is a reflection of your capacity for compassion.
Questions People Often Ask When the World Feels Heavy
Why do world events affect me so strongly?
Many highly sensitive or empathetic people feel the suffering of others deeply. Hearing about tragedy, violence, or injustice can activate grief, fear, and compassion all at once.
Is it normal to feel both anger and compassion at the same time?
Yes. Anger often emerges when something we deeply love feels threatened. It is possible to hold anger and compassion together without letting anger turn into hatred.
How can I care about the world without becoming overwhelmed?
One way is to focus on the areas where you do have influence—your family, your community, your relationships. Compassion becomes sustainable when we channel it into meaningful action within our own sphere.
Can therapy help if the world feels emotionally overwhelming?
Yes. Therapy can help highly sensitive and compassionate people learn how to hold grief, anger, and empathy without becoming emotionally depleted.
Burnout in Highly Sensitive Women: Motherhood, Homeschooling, and Learning to Choose Less
Burnout is real, and when you throw motherhood into the mix, it’s a whole new level of chaos. Let me take you on my journey through it. 😅
It all started after grad school, just after I’d bought a house and thought I was doing everything right. I went to my doctor, (who was used to seeing me every few weeks because I was constantly sick. I didn’t realize at the time my body was trying to tell me to rest, take it down a notch. I blamed it on a bad immune system and working with kids.) Anyway, there I was, sitting in my doctor’s office, tears streaming down my face. He asked, “What’s wrong?” and all I could say was, “I don’t know! Everything in my life is good—I just graduated, bought a house, life is great.” He looked at me, nodded, and reached for his prescription pad, saying,”You don’t have to feel this way, I can help.” Desperate, I nodded in agreement.
Burnout often shows up differently in highly sensitive or neurodivergent women, especially during seasons like motherhood and homeschooling.
Burnout: My Journey to Less
Burnout is real (even when your life looks good on paper)
Burnout can show up differently in highly sensitive and neurodivergent women, especially during seasons of motherhood and when you have school aged children, especially if you decide to homeschool. What looked like anxiety or exhaustion in my life was actually a nervous system asking for a different pace, a different rhythm, and a different way of living. It took me years to realize that what I thought was anxiety or depression was actually burnout in a highly sensitive nervous system.
Burnout often looks different in highly sensitive or neurodivergent women. Instead of obvious collapse, it can look like constant exhaustion, frequent illness, feeling overwhelmed by everyday tasks, or wondering why everyone else seems able to handle more. Many women who later discover they are highly sensitive, ADHD, autistic, or AuDHD spend years believing they are simply “too much” or “not resilient enough,” when in reality their nervous systems are processing far more than most people realize
Why this matters: Burnout is real, and when you throw motherhood into the mix, it’s a whole new level of chaos. Let me take you on my journey through it. 😅
It all started after grad school, just after I’d bought a house and thought I was doing everything *right.* I went to my doctor, (who was used to seeing me every few weeks because I was constantly sick. I didn’t realize at the time my body was trying to tell me to rest, take it down a notch. I blamed it on a bad immune system and working with kids.) Anyway, there I was, sitting in my doctor’s office, tears streaming down my face. He asked, “What’s wrong?” and all I could say was, “I don’t know! Everything in my life is good—I just graduated, bought a house, life is great.” He looked at me, nodded, and reached for his prescription pad, saying,”You don’t have to feel this way, I can help.” Desperate, I nodded in agreement.
When Burnout looks like anxiety or depression
The meds helped… for a while. But deep down, I knew it wasn’t just depression, it wasn’t just anxiety. I didn’t know what it was at the time, I just knew that getting through the day was a task. I worked, and slept. 🙃 I had drained my energy reserves trying to juggle grad school, two jobs, and all the demands life threw at me. My plate was way too full, and I had no idea how to pace myself.
I mean, you’d think being a therapist, I’d understand burnout, right? But nope—I was too busy trying to be Do The Things… and wondering why I kept crashing into walls. It turns out that knowing all the theory doesn’t help when you’re busy ignoring the giant flashing “Warning: You’re Burning Out!” signs in your own life. 🤦♀️
Learning that Self-Care is more than bubble baths
Eventually, I did what any overwhelmed human would do—I started taking things off my plate. *Fast.* I learned to set boundaries and redefine self-care. And spoiler alert: self-care is way more than bubble baths and eating healthy. 🛁🌿 I needed real rest—more sleep, time to play, and moments to just *be.* I needed fewer commitments, fewer expectations, and more time outdoors.
Motherhood and the Return of Overwhelm
Gradually, I got better. And then… I became a mom. 👶 Just like that, the to-do lists multiplied overnight. The self-care strategies that had worked so well before? Out the window. Now, it was crying babies, endless time commitments, and the exhaustion of keeping a tiny humans alive while trying to survive myself. The overwhelm was back, and I had to adjust—again.
So, I shifted gears. Soulful art became finger painting in the bathtub. 🎨 My quiet time morphed from Enya and candles to cuddles and Baby Mozart. 🍼 Priorities changed. The clean house? Less important. Being present? The new goal. I found moments where I could sink my feet into the grass while keeping my toddlers contained. I adjusted, and it worked… for a while.
But as my kids grew, so did the commitments—extracurriculars, school, work deadlines. It was all *too much.* And in the midst of this chaos, I decided to open my own business. This may seem counter-intuitive but I was tired. My thought was if I am dumping all this time into someone else’s vision, why not do it for myself, my way. I needed more control, I needed to do things on my terms. This was a game-changer, giving me a chance to create a schedule that worked for me, to slow down the grind while still supporting my family.
Discovering I was a Highly Sensitive Person and why burnout suddenly made sense
Then, by chance, by happenstance, through synchronicty, I am not sure how I got there honestly, but I came across the term Highly Sensitive by Elaine Aron. Insert deep dive here, and I realized I was highly sensitive. Trying to keep up with “normies” (no offense, normies, I love you) was just not in the cards for me. I couldn't compare my schedule to others. I had to accept that I was wired differently, that my energy had limits, and that burning myself out trying to meet everyone else's expectations was never going to work. I needed to play by my own rules.
But burnout? It’s a sneaky beast. Some mornings, even getting out of bed felt impossible. Staying awake past my kids’ bedtime? Forget about it. I often fell asleep moments after tucking them in, sometimes even in their beds. If I tried pushing past and staying up late, my body reminded me to rest by getting sick and forcing me back to bed.
My self-care was pretty good. Monthly acupuncture, Check. Good sleep, Check. Eating healthy, Check. Leaning into others, still a struggle. Making sure I set boundaries, Check. However, the drowning feeling was still there. I was managing, but not living fully.
The Unexpected Nervous System Reset
Then came COVID. Our lives, like everyone else’s, turned upside down. The kids came home, and I shifted to doing virtual therapy. I closed my physical office—a space I had poured my heart into creating—and with a heavy heart, I re-evaluated *everything.* When the next school year came, I decided to homeschool. It started as a practical decision because of the pandemic, but it turned out to be an unexpected gift. 🌟
Gone were the daily battles over time, the morning rushes, the “GET YOUR SHOES ON NOW!” meltdowns. We traded those for schoolwork done in pajamas, laundry tossed in between clients, and well-rested kids who no longer had to face after-school homework wars.
For my family, the pandemic, despite all its hardships, actually reduced our stress. And as the world started to return to “normal,” I realized I didn't want to go back. I didn't want the chaos, the frantic pace, the burnout.
Choosing a Slower Life
So, we chose *less*. Not as some radical act of rebellion, but as a conscious choice for calm and sanity. In all that hustle, I hadn't even realized my boys were feeling burned out too. Most of our conflicts came from being bone-tired or being hungry and not being able to get food on the table fast enough. We were done with the fast-paced, on-demand lifestyle. We needed a slower rhythm, more time to recover. ❤️
Now, four years into homeschooling, we sleep more than most families. We have less structure. We have one or two activities, and social events are maybe once a week. Our house? Still not always clean. Often, we're home together but each in our own space, doing our own thing. Our time still includes cuddles on the couch, game nights, and things that are slower paced.
Like all moms, I worry whether I'm doing things right. Will my kids be stereotyped as "awkward homeschoolers"? Am I harming them by not making their childhood more demanding? Honestly, I don't have the answers to those questions yet. What I do know is that I've been able to preserve my sanity. I don't fight with my kids as much, and our time as a family is peaceful. Maybe I can send them into the world without their nervous systems being on fire, without starting adulthood already burned out. If that's the case, I'll take the awkwardness. 🙂
Many of the women I work with are highly sensitive, neurodivergent, creative, or homeschooling parents who have spent years trying to function at a pace that simply doesn’t fit their nervous system. Therapy can help you understand your wiring, reduce burnout, and build a life that supports your energy instead of constantly draining it.
By choosing less, I found more—more time, more peace, more connection. Maybe you can too! Sometimes, the best decision is the one that lets you just *breathe*.
If this story resonates with you it could be because…
• You’re a highly sensitive woman who feels overwhelmed by the pace of modern life
• You suspect you may be neurodivergent (ADHD, autistic, or AuDHD) but were never recognized growing up
• You’re a thoughtful, creative, or intuitive person who absorbs the emotions and needs of everyone around you
• You’re a homeschooling or alternative-education parent trying to create a calmer life for your family
• You’re capable, insightful, and responsible… but constantly exhausted
If you think you are ready to start therapy, schedule a free consult.
Questions Highly Sensitive and Neurodivergent Women Often Ask
Why do highly sensitive women burn out more easily?
Highly sensitive nervous systems process more emotional and sensory input, which can lead to faster exhaustion when life becomes overwhelming.
Can burnout look like anxiety or depression?
Yes. Burnout can show up as exhaustion, irritability, frequent illness, emotional overwhelm, or feeling like even simple tasks require enormous effort.
Can therapy help highly sensitive or neurodivergent women with burnout?
Therapy can help you understand how your nervous system works, develop boundaries that protect your energy, and create a life rhythm that supports rather than overwhelms you.
With love and healing,
Laura 💖
Sailing Smoothly: Carnival Cruise Lines and KultureCity Partner to Create Sensory-Friendly Vacations and 11 Tips for Sailing with Sensory Issues
As a therapist who specializes in working with Highly Sensitive People and neurodivergent individuals, and being a sensitive person myself, I was pleasantly surprised to discover that Carnival Cruise Lines had made significant adjustments to address sensory sensitivities. It was heartening to see that they had implemented measures to accommodate passengers like me.
Recently, I embarked on my second cruise adventure with Carnival Cruise Lines and had a sensory-sensitive revelation that I just had to share. While I'm far from a cruise expert, I felt compelled to commend Carnival Cruise Lines for their remarkable partnership with KultureCity, transforming the cruise experience for travelers like me who have heightened sensory awareness.
My first cruise, a pre-Covid 3-day voyage to Cancun, Mexico, was undeniably enjoyable. It was just my husband and I, and not having to worry about food or kids…as well as meeting some friends, really made the cruise a vacation. However, as someone who tends to get overwhelmed by excessive stimulation, spending three days amidst a bustling cruise ship presented it’s challenges. Navigating through the mid-deck to reach food became a sensory journey of its own: music blaring, casino bells chiming, the scent of smoke wafting through the air, abrupt temperature shifts as I moved from indoor to outdoor areas, and the constant shift in lighting conditions. Not to mention, the sheer number of fellow passengers made it feel overwhelming. To avoid the crowd, I often resorted to traversing the lower decks, even though it meant a longer route. Our cabin, though a welcome retreat, was positioned in a high-traffic hallway, making uninterrupted sleep a rare luxury for this light sleeper.
So, when my husband proposed a second cruise as a special gift for my 50th birthday, my initial reaction was mixed. On one hand, the prospect of not having to worry about cooking and cleanup for a week was enticing. (Have I mentioned how much I hate cooking, well not actually cooking, it’s the clean-up) On the other hand, I wondered if I would once again be engulfed in sensory overload. This time, however, I came prepared. I packed my Loop earplugs (see my unboxing video here) and my trusty essential oils. I also brought a fan to help with temperature control. Excitement and apprehension warred within me as I contemplated five days on the cruise ship, sharing a cabin with our teenagers. Would I endure sensory overwhelm, potentially ruining our vacation?
As a therapist who specializes in working with Highly Sensitive People and neurodivergent individuals, and being a sensitive person myself, I was pleasantly surprised to discover that Carnival Cruise Lines had made significant adjustments to address issues for those of us prone to sensory sensitivities. It was heartening to see that they had implemented measures to accommodate passengers like me.
So, what exactly does being Sensory Certified entail? It means that Carnival now has customer-facing staff trained to understand the unique needs of individuals with various sensory challenges, including Down Syndrome, Autism, ADHD, PTSD, and more. Carnival, in collaboration with KultureCity, introduced VIP Lanyards that staff could use to easily identify passengers who might require additional support. One of the highlights of our cruise was the silent disco night held on the mid-deck, which attracted a substantial crowd. In addition, the nightclubs now featured closed doors to minimize disruptions to those passing by. A welcome change from my initial cruise with Carnival.
First, the lines for food were noticeably shorter, reducing the sensory stress of waiting in crowded spaces. Second, their updated HUB app allowed guests to make reservations at their assigned restaurant, receiving a convenient text notification when their table was ready. This allowed for us to hang out in quieter spaces while waiting. However, the most remarkable change was Carnival's introduction of sensory kits that could be borrowed during the cruise. To my immense joy and that of my sensory-sensitive family, Carnival had forged a partnership with the non-profit organization, "KultureCity," becoming the first Sensory Certified cruise line in the process..
For me, these thoughtful changes made my cruise an absolute delight. Carnival Cruise Lines' commitment to inclusivity and their partnership with KultureCity have transformed the cruise experience for individuals like me, turning what could have been a sensory overload into a genuinely enjoyable vacation. Whether you're a seasoned cruiser or considering your first voyage, Carnival's dedication to creating a sensory-friendly environment deserves recognition and applause.
In a twist of fate, our initially planned 5-day cruise turned into a memorable 7-day journey as we found ourselves tailing a hurricane, which resulted in the closure of our intended ports of call. During these unforeseen extra days at sea, Carnival Cruise Lines truly shone in their commitment to ensuring the well-being and satisfaction of their guests. The crew, with a special shout out to Todd (T-O- double “D”) for sharing his positive energy, went above and beyond to keep everyone informed about the situation, making regular announcements and providing updates on the evolving weather conditions. Despite the unexpected extension of our voyage, Carnival continued to offer top-notch service and entertainment, maintaining the high standards they are known for. It was a testament to their dedication that, even in the face of an unforeseen challenge, they managed to turn it into an adventure, and our extended cruise became a treasured memory.
Now, for those who may embark on a cruise with sensory sensitivities like mine, here are some valuable tips to enhance your experience:
Your 11 Tips to To Cruising with Sensory Issues
1. **Travel with Headphones/Earplugs:** Always carry noise-canceling headphones or earplugs to create your personal oasis amidst the ship's vibrant atmosphere.
2. **Choose a Quieter Room Location:** Opt for staterooms located toward the front or back of the ship to minimize exposure to constant foot traffic and public spaces.
3. **Select Rooms Below Inactive Decks:** Avoid rooms beneath active decks or venues to reduce disturbances from overhead activities.
4. **Be Cautious of Casino Proximity:** Stay away from rooms near the casino if you're sensitive to cigarette smoke to avoid unpleasant odors.
5. **Bring a Portable Fan:** Portable fans offer white noise and temperature control, creating a comfortable and peaceful environment.
6. **Consider Inside Cabins for Sleep:** Inside cabins may lack views but are often quieter and ideal for restful sleep.
7. **Request a Sensory Kit Early:** Contact guest services early in your cruise to request a sensory kit for managing sensitivities.
8. **Make Restaurant Reservations Online:** Use the cruise line's app or platform to reserve tables and avoid long waits in crowded dining areas.
9. **Discover Quiet Spots:** Explore the ship to find serene, secluded areas that resonate with you for moments of relaxation.
10. **Pack Sunglasses:** Sunglasses reduce glare and enhance outdoor comfort, shielding your eyes from bright sunlight.
11. **Adjust Your Schedule:** Plan activities during off-peak hours to avoid crowds and enjoy popular attractions with fewer people around.
For more information about Carnival Cruise Lines' Sensory Certification, you can visit their official website here. To learn more about KultureCity's partnership with Carnival, please visit their website here.
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